Why is leaving the family cabin to my kids a problem?

In most circumstances, we want to treat our kids equally when it comes to our estate plan.  And with most assets this is not a problem.  Cash, securities, qualified plans, even the family home can all be left to our adult children without any fear that this distribution will cause a problem for the adult children (as long as the distribution is In equal shares).

People are often surprised when I tell them that families do not fight over money when a loved one dies.  They have a hard time believing me when I tell them that the fights occur over the emotional items such as family photo albums and the numerous household items that remind us of a simpler time when we were a close family living together.

Knowing that it is generally the emotional items we leave behind that cause adult children to argue when a loved one passes, it should be no surprise that the family cabin causes the greatest stress among family members.

The family cabin is a special place chock full of family memories.  And the thought of selling it and dividing up the proceeds doesn’t feel right to the kids or the parents.  It is the one family asset that the family wants to enjoy in perpetuity and there lies the problem. Additional necessary information you can read on this page.

The children now own a valuable piece of property together and this multiple ownership situation is destined to be a disaster for the kids without a framework to address those problems.  The problems with multiple ownership of the cabin are many…

Just to name a few:

  • Who gets to use it and when?
  • Who is responsible for its upkeep?
  • Who will put in the dock?
  • Who will winterize the cabin?
  • Who should pay the taxes and expenses?
  • What if a child cannot pay their share?
  • What if one or more children want to sell and the others do not?

These are just a few examples of why it is virtually impossible for even the best families to work these issues out without some degree of stress.

Every cabin owner who wishes to leave the family cabin to the children someday needs to know this:

It is the rule and not the exception, that your children’s relationships will suffer greatly.

Therefore, every cabin owner must choose one of the following outcomes:

  1. Leave the family cabin to the kids knowing your children’s relationships will never be the same.
  2. Force the sale of the cabin at your passing knowing that you likely have saved your children’s ongoing adult relationships.
  3. Put together a Cabin Trust or LLC that lays out the parameters of the cabin’s use, equity, taxes, expenses, rules and buy out provisions.

If it is your wish that your children shall have the cabin to enjoy after your passing, it is essential that you put together a framework that can accomplish your goal and may even strengthen your family’s relationships rather than destroy them.

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